Age

JF was late today because he was lost on the way here. He thinks he's losing his mind. He has neuropathy and tremors and back pain. He told me that he doesn't like the treadmill at all. He doesn't want to exercise and it's "hell" getting old. He thinks of aging as a series of giving up things. He's thought it ma be better to die young. I hear this.

Probably aging is our greatest challenge, and it's our final test. Things change. I wouldn't say that we just give things up. I would say that things change. We change. Our perceptions, skills, priorities and environments change. Still, throughout time we are either growing or we aren't. To me, if we aren't growing then we're shrinking. I suppose there should be a neutral option: non-growth. However, I think that non-growth is shrinkage. Over time, the challenges we are faced with increase in complexity and severity. So if there hasn't been growth there has been a relative decrease in our ability to handle our lives. A person with the capacity of a ten year old can't handle the challenges of a thirty-something year old person. So we have to keep growing to keep up. "Growing" isn't about skin or looks or athletic capacity. These things tend to degenerate. Our nature is such that bodies degenerate. Then, when they are old enough they die. Otherwise, they suddenly break and we die. The other option is that we break them through carelessness or war or something.

Aging has to be about growing. We have to be big enough to go beyond our physical existence. If the only point of it all is to be a body, a series of cells functioning to perform activities related to motion, there isn't much beyond youth. But it isn't that way because there is also cognitive and spiritual function. That is where the growth is. If we neglect these areas, then as the bodies degenerate we are left with very little. Interestingly, in the case where we also lose cognition (which in some sense is purely a physical process) there is nothing left except the spiritual component of a person. So we should grow that. We should spend some of our time - some of our lives - doing that. It gives aging purpose. Then, we aren't just going through a series of giving things up. We're going through a series of trading. We are trading lifetime for experience and growth. The trick is to get enough out of the trade.